We all want to know how to get our crushes to like us. In a perfect world, nothing would be better if things went smoothly: I like him, I find out he likes me, and we date. The end. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. But what if I could help you attract him? In this article, I am going to give you 5 things to do to get him to have a crush on you.
Treat Him Differently: Elusiveness
First off, I am not telling you to play hard to get. If you play hard to get your crush isn’t going to like you back. In fact, you’re probably going to do more damage because:
- Guys have sensitive egos and don’t want to risk being turned down
- Men may be talking to other women and just go after them instead
That doesn’t mean you should be easy either. The trick is elusiveness. To be elusive you need two things:
- You need to show him he has an easier chance of winning you over while…
- Other men have a hard chance of winning you over.
This accomplishes several things: He is going to feel he has something that other men do not. He’s going to feel there is something about him that pulled you in specifically. “Why else would she like me and not other men?” This is going to boost his ego and you’re going to come off non threatening. This is going to have him target you more and try to win you over.
At the same time, you’re not coming off as easy because you’re demonstrating that he’s the only one who can win you over. Other men are not an issue in this situation.
Now of course you may be talking to other men and that’s fine. Just give the illusion that you’re strictly interested in him.
If he asks you if you’re talking to other men, then I am going to tell you to go with your gut instinct on answering him.
I know that’s not the answer you want to hear but here is the thing: men are terrible with controlling their emotions and a lot of the times they are idiots with double standards. They expect you to only talk to them while they prowl around. Fuck that shit. Do you girl! At the same time, men usually talk to other women while expecting you to talk to them because they don’t have confidence in themselves. They think they can either lose you to another man or can’t get the options or abundance like you can.
Scarcity is a bitch. It raises the value of anything. When he only has you and you have multiple men at your feet, it’s going to make all the difference. That’s why I say follow your gut and say what you have to say.
Get Your Crush To Like You With Quality Spurts
When we tend to like someone, we over do it with the contact. We are having conversations over text, wanting to talk to them daily, and so forth. This is a no go.
Instead, you need to focus on quality and delivering the exact message and image to him that you want to get across. The amount of times you hang out or talk doesn’t mean a damn thing if you’re not doing it correctly.
Men will get bored with you fast if that’s all you want to do. We all become different people after 90 days in a relationship because our brains are now in habit mode, we’re not getting that same dopamine response, the honeymoon stage is over, and we see the true person behind the masks. Make sure you deliver quality first then work up to quantity.
Associate Yourself With Good Things To Get Him To Like You
I cannot express the importance of the law of association. Let me tell you a story:
In both relationships, while we did go out and do things, we spent a lot of time at home, hanging out, cooking, watching movies, cuddling, talking, and so forth. But here is the thing: I really really really liked Sarah a lot more than Raquel. Why?
When I was with Sarah, I was at the prime of my life thus far. I don’t know what it was but my relationship with my family, friends, and here was perfect, I had a lot of money, school was amazing as where my grades, everything seemed to go right, and it was winter at the time so everyone was in the Christmas spirit.
However when I was with Raquel, I was always tired, didn’t like my job, didn’t have as much money because I transferred, didn’t have a lot of ambition, and couldn’t stand my boss.
It’s not Raquel’s fault by any means but my brain can’t help but associate her with that time in my life. We both were in that slump and began to argue, get in fights, and eventually broke it off. Sadly that’s what I remember.
Moral of the story: Association is a powerful thing. If you can associate yourself with great things then try as much as possible. It makes all the difference. That’s why I only want you hanging out in the beginning if you’re delivering quality. You’re seen as an escape from reality to him.
Okay, Now Focus On Quantity
Once you get that quality up, it’s time to get more of those experiences.
Am I telling you that you have to be perfect every time you see him? Not at all. I just want you to have more energy. I want you to stick out from other women. I want you to “Under promise but over deliver” I guess you can say (as should he).
Life is just easier that way and men will naturally drawn towards you.
In fact, your job is to build attraction here in a different way. Not just try to maintain quality.
Quality in the beginning is a way to build the foundation. It lets the man know “what could be” I guess you can say.
The idea is to build the like, connection, and chemistry between you two and then let is flow into the other meetings between you two.
Show Your Crush You’re An Asset and Not A Liability
I have been saying this since I started helping women attract men:
There are two reasons men don’t date you (outside of their own person/intrinsic reasons):
- Other women
- You’re not what men want evolutionarily (assets vs liability)
I want to focus on the second point. Men love a woman who
- makes him want to be a better man
- Shows promise
- Has her shit together
- Iis confident in herself
- Has her own life
- Lets him have his
- Isn’t clingy
- knows how to handle a situation
- Can carry her own
- Lets him have his freedom
- and so forth
A man can see when a woman is a liability:
- Is lacking confidence
- Has low self-esteem
- Doesn’t have her life or shit together
- Doesn’t have her life worked out or any passions
- Argues a lot
- Always anxious
- Covers up her body too much because she doesn’t like it
- and so on
When me see these things, he knows it’s going to affect him so he tries to avoid it. In fact, when men go on first dates with women, we’re most likely interested. We are just seeing if you have too many red flags or how you react in certain situations.
That’s why we may first be interested then completely lose interest in a matter of hours: Because we know how you really are once we got to know you.
So what does that mean for you? It means chill out, relax, do you, don’t worry about him, have your own life and let him have his, stop taking yourself so seriously, stop taking the whole relationship seriously, get some confidence and self esteem boost, love life, hang out, and have fun. There is not much more you can do.
I know this advice is cliche but the thing is men are constantly looking for reasons to justify why someone is or isn’t the right person. Don’t ruin your chances because you have some personal issues with yourself.
Don’t Give A Shit About How To Get Him To Have A Crush On You
There are only two ways to live life:
“To live up to all the impossible expectations or to stop taking yourself so damn seriously”
I feel when women try to get a guy to like them, they only do damage. A guy will like a woman for the most weirdest of reasons and most awkward of times. The best thing to do is to just do you girl.
Stop analyzing every little thing you’re doing or wondering if he likes you or not. I remember when I use to be the guy who would literally take a notepad out and write down a list of reasons why she liked me and why I thought she didn’t:
|Why I think she likes me||Why I think she doesn’t|
I never felt so pathetic in my life. Seriously. Writing this makes me want to throw up. I feel disgusted that I even had to write a list of reason to validate why someone likes me. At the same time, I was young and you will have to learn somehow so I might as well learn it then and there.
Here is the thing: don’t worry about it.
If you read my book, watch the stuff I put out on this article and on my Youtube channel, you will be set. If you do those things and he doesn’t like you, you’re only doing more harm trying to make him like you.
You can’t make someone like you. Attraction is unmasked. If it’s there then take it. Of course the stuff I teach will help but it’s the natural way to build attraction. It’s what men naturally want. So if it doesn’t work for you, you’re just not what he wants personally. Don’t take it to heart.
If you want to learn anymore about getting someone to like you, check out my free ebook or Youtube channel