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3 Things You Might Be Doing That Pushing Men Away and Don’t Even Know It

3 Things You Might Be Doing That Pushing Men Away and Don’t Even Know It

There are mistakes that women make that drive men away and make them not to commit. If you know these things, and make efforts to correct or avoid making these mistakes, your relationship would have a better chance of lasting. In this article I am going to give you 3 things you may not know you’re doing that push him away.

Not Understanding How Men Work

The first thing you may be doing that pushes men away from you is as a result of not understanding the male mind and how it works. The male and the female go about things in different ways and if you don’t know this fact, it brings about needless arguments in relationships. Don’t expect the mind of the male to work the same way as that of a female. For instance, women handle things by talking while men handle them by creating space. This could make a man pull away, and you end up chasing him all due to miscommunication.

One thing you should keep in mind is that relationships unfold differently for men and women. Women love the communication, the rapport, the trust and the general building of things or what is known as the chemistry or the bonding aspects of a relationship. Men are a bit more physical about it; they like to see how they make you smile, how he makes you feel, etc. If he touches you by placing his hand on the small of your back, do you pull away? If he does that and you brush off his hand or shrug him off, men can take that reaction as an offensive one. Of course, you are at liberty to tell him if you are ready for his touch or not, depending on your mood at the time.  But a guy takes such actions differently.hardcoverjacket_747x1076-2

If a guy doesn’t open up to you, you may perceive it as a negative sign. That is an exact equivalent to your reaction when your man places his hand on your lower back and you brush his hands off. He will think, “Okay, she’s not ready, she’s not answering me” and makes him feel indifferent. Guys are physical when it comes to things like that. Men are dominators.

No Need For Arguing

I’ve always believed that there is no reason for a man and a woman in a relationship to have arguments. All it takes is for the man to know what the woman needs, her wants, her love for communication and rapport and be able to meet them, without affecting the way he does things as a male. The same applies to the woman; if she understands that her man likes to pull away and do his own thing, loves being physical when it comes to communication, and doesn’t always like to open up; and both of you can meet each other halfway, then relationships will be so much easier.

Coming Off Way Too Strong Way Too Fast

Now, I have mentioned this fact several times, especially in my videos. This is a crucial point that women need to understand. Never come off as if you want a relationship. Attraction doesn’t work that way with guys, and that could be a major turn off for him. You just have to meet each other halfway. Therefore, when women say things like,

“So, what are you looking for? I’m looking for a relationship. I don’t want to do go any further or do anything unless you are looking for a relationship like I am.” Or something like, “I’m not hooking up with you until I’m your girlfriend.”

You’re out.

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You don’t need to say things like that. It’s not necessary. When you say things like that to a guy, he takes it offensively. I know why you say it. You don’t want to waste your time with losers and know his intentions but here is the thing: if he had bad intentions, he’d lie to you either way. There is a time and place for it like when he’s actually making a move on you.

One thing you need to realize is that the male ego is everything to him, so when he hears something like that, he’s just like, “What?” This is why it is important for both sexes to understand where the other is coming from. So even if it comes up in a conversation, having a knowledge of this fact will enable the relationship to start off easier as both sexes meet each other halfway in their discussions, not argue, push each other away and get along much better with each other.

The problem usually lies in the fact the women tend to overdo this by being all about “relationship, relationship, relationship” while there might be some men out there with low egos who think relationships are all about “sex, sex, and more sex” or getting more physical. When both sexes meet with such issues, they will pull away and be repelled by the other person’s needs or wants. You two obviously are not on the same page so don’t try to make it work when it’s not going to. Find someone who wants the same thing.

Needless Mind Games

The third and last point are the matter of mind games. A lot of individuals play mind games when they are not needed. Both sexes do it but I am a coach for women so listen up:

I believe women who create mind games validation and approval. For instance, if I text you because I want to reach out, or show interest in you, and you are like,

“I’m not going to text him back, so I want him to text me again. I want to see where stands with me. If he likes me, he will text me again.”

As far as I’m concerned, you are just trying to seek approval or validation and trying to see where I stand with you. You’re going to feel good when I reach out because it feeds your validation but you’re going to be pissed if I don’t. So don’t do it. It’s only going to cause bullshit drama and start things that don’t need to be there. If he’s doing it, don’t feed it. Just keep to your game plan. I think women do it for approval and validation seeking behavior while men do it to gain more power or ground. It’s not needed so don’t go back and forth with it.

 

There you ladies go! Let me know in the comments what you think.

 

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About Me

What's going on everybody? It's your favorite dating coach, Elliot Scott! I am a 29 year old who lives in Boise ID spending most of my time doing what I love most: helping people find quality relationships