I know how it is. When a guy pulls away, you start to flip out. Everything that you thought was going well now feels fake and that this “great” guy is not so great afterall. Or, is he? Do you know the reasons he’s pulling away? Are you making it worse? I briefly want to go over 5 things not to do when a guy pulls away so you don’t self-sabotage your relationship.
Find Out What To Do If He Pulls Away
Most don’t know what to do when he pulls away. Obviously you’re going to react. But I mean actually “react” and make things worse. The reactions we have to things that we don’t like are usually bad. I am not saying you have to sit back and take it but don’t make the situation worse and sabotage a great thing unless you know for a fact he’s pulling away without your interest in mind.
A good example of reacting is a girl flipping out when a guy doesn’t text back. Is it okay to text a guy? Sure. He probably wants to hear from you. It’s when he doesn’t respond and you send:
I can’t tell you how many times I was busy and came back to something like this. Turned me off completely. It shows me the woman is a nut job. She may not be but how do I know? I have to go with what you give me. Don’t give him any ammunition.
Create a Downward Spiral
When a guy pulls away, all that was good seems lost and you get in your own way. You’re your own worst enemy and you don’t even need to be. You start to think negatively, get in your own head, come up with stupid assumptions, and say things like, “I knew I shouldn’t have done X” or I knew I should have done Y” When I bet those things wouldn’t even matter.
What is worse is when you create a downward spiral, you feed the other 4 things I have on this list. Just keep calm, stay in place, and relax. Come up with a plan. Put yourself in his shoes.
Suddenly Become Needy
We become needy all of a sudden because we are scared that we are going to lose the one thing that was going great in our life. The thing is when you become needy, you lose value. You show that you’re not scarce, you become too available, and you actually give off the vibe that you’re going to suppress him…..
Man’s biggest fear of getting in a relationship is feeling suppressed.
Put Yourself Down
You become your worst critic. No one knows you better than you know yourself. And what are you going to do? You’re going to peck at every little flaw that you know of. Ones that he has never seen or will see. And when you start to pick at your brain, it only magnifies the problem and you will become more insecure and needy.
Never compare yourself to others and put yourself down. It’s a paradox you will never win. Always strive for improvement but never perfection. Society as tricked us into believing that we need to be perfect. Trust me as long as you progress daily, you will be well ahead of everyone else and even surprise yourself. The problem a lot of us have is we play victim and sit and mope over things we can’t change.
What we chase, runs away. Do I need to say more?