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Revealed! 30 Foolproof Signs He’s Jealous And Hiding It-How To Tell If A Guy Is Jealous

I am a guy and I would be lying if I didn’t say that sometimes, I can’t stand how we act. When a guy is jealous, he acts like a big baby. Some guys are great with it and know how to handle the situation. They don’t let it escalate and get the girl’s attention again. Other guys however freak out and think you’re such a bitch and have to make you pay. In this article, I am going to go over not only the signs he’s jealous and hiding it but why men get jealous and why they try to hide it.

The Top Signs A Guy Is Jealous And Likes You

There are plenty of signs and hints that a guy is jealous of you even if he tries to hide it. The top things that stick out to me as a dating coach are:

  1. He pulls away in hopes you chase (he wants validation)
  2. He competes for you amongst other men
  3. He tries to make you jealous of him (again, we need validation)
  4. He plays his jealousy off like he doesn’t care but you can tell he does
  5. He starts to ask questions about your whereabouts or who you’re talking to
  6. He leaves his masculine energy and goes into more feminine energy to seek approval
  7. He acts out of character where you can tell something is wrong (Territorial or aggressive)

Here is a chart of the 6 most common things he does when he’s jealous:

If there is anything you get out of this article, know that it is very easy to tell if a guy is jealous of you. You just have to focus on two things:

  • The fact that men need validation and when they’re jealous, they will find ways to seek it
  • You have to compare how he was before being jealous versus how he’s acting now. If your gut is telling you he’s jealous, he probably is.

Why Guys Get Jealous: If You Know This, You Can Make Any Guy Jealous

It is our job as men to win women over. That is how the evolutionary process goes. If we can’t convince a woman that we are a catch and worthy of her time, then by definition, we are sterile.

We as men strongly associate our power, success, self-esteem, and self-worth with how well we can attract quality women. If he can’t he’s going to have a world of problems.

Jealousy, from an evolutionary perspective, is a defense mechanism telling him that his assets are in danger or there is a threat of them being taken away. He obviously doesn’t want this. Why? Several reasons:

  • It took resources to win you over
  • He has evolutionary advantages over having these assets you give him (if you’re a highly sought after woman for example, if he has you, his status is boosted because he has something everyone else wants)
  • Losing you as an asset to another man not only lowers his status and ego, but the man has an evolutionary advantage over him now. This can be both personal and social. For example, if we look at it from a social perspective, he doesn’t look as desirable to other women if he isn’t able to keep a woman around If his job is to be a provider and satisfied, a woman leaving him for another man gives off the assumption he’s not doing his job.  From a more personal perspective, maybe he invested a lot in you then lost you to another man or he saw you as the perfect mate for his future family but now the other man has the advantage of you being his perfect mate.

The best way to know if a guy is jealous or to even make him jealous is to look at it from the perspective of the 3 bullet points above. It’s all evolutionary. If he invests in you, likes you, or is getting an advantage from you and he feels there is a threat such as him losing you to another man or you becoming disinterested, that will spark jealousy in him.

I have a  VERY good article below that will help you in making a guy regret leaving you. Yes, you can make him jealous even if he’s the one who pulled away:

MUST-READ: How To Make A Guy Regret Leaving You In 3 Easy Steps

That is not how it works. If a guy tells you he doesn’t want a girlfriend and you stick around, then by logic (because he said he doesn’t want a girlfriend and you stick around), you’ve moved into the causal-friends-with-benefits category.

Instead, you need to avoid that talk altogether for the first 8 weeks and just focus on having fun and winning him over. When you have that talk at the end of the 8 weeks and he doesn’t comply, kick him to the side.

NOTE: It’s important to understand that if a man gets jealous and he’s the low-ego/insecure type, he IS going to try to play mind games to regain an advantage. Do NOT overlook this. Here are two very in-depth guides to help you stay one step ahead of him:

MUST-READ: The Ultimate Guide On His Mind Games

And of course, if you do end up losing power, I have another in-depth article you should check out:

MUST-READ: The Ultimate Guide On Getting Men To Chase You And Beg To Be Your Boyfriend

Why Do Guys Hide Their Jealousy? Why Not Just Tell Me And Solve The Problem?

Men hide it because we are power envy. You can mark it up as a masculine thing or that society doesn’t like seeing mean as weaklings and I would say you’re right. However, we hide it because of how a lot of men view relationships. We think:

  • She wants a strong man. Not a bitch
  • If I show her my feelings she has the power
  • I don’t want to reveal my cards
  • I don’t want to seem eager or emotional
  • I don’t want to be turned down
  • I am not going to reveal my jealousy because I don’t even know if she likes me

At the end of the day, it comes down to power. Men just don’t want to give up ground and we believe if we show signs of weakness, you will devour us.

How To Tell If A Guy Is Jealous Of Me Talking To Other Men

First, I would argue that the majority of men will feel some type of jealousy if you’re showing more interest in one man over him. That doesn’t mean he will react, stop you, or call you out. But it’s normal for us to feel that.

As I said earlier, a guy gets jealous because there is a threat to the “advantages” he has over other men. This advantage would be he has access to you. You’re an advantage because you have assets whether that’s him enjoying his time with you, hooking up, the validation you give him, you being an option, and so on. When these things are being threatened, jealousy arises because the natural primitive reason for jealousy is to warn us that there is a threat to our assets. 

What a lot of women don’t put together is that even if he doesn’t like you, he can still get jealous. A “threat” doesn’t always mean he’s jealous due to his feelings for you. It can also be a hit to his ego that will spark jealousy. No man wants to lose a woman to another guy. That will scar him for future women he’s trying to attract. If it happens enough, he may become emotionally unavailable. That is why men are so protective and territorial when it comes to this kind of stuff. The more unstable or emotionally unavailable he is, the more likely you’re going to see those patterns.

I think the signs that he’s jealous of other men would be the following:

It’s not a good idea to intentionally make a guy jealous of other men. There is no point in doing that. I am not saying it can’t work. But I think the risk is high especially when women naturally care more for the man and outcome than the average man does. If you’re going to try to make him jealous to get a certain outcome, be prepared for him to retaliate in a way you may not like. If you think the average guy is going to sit around and take that in the modern dating age ESPECIALLY if you’re not official, not a chance. 

The only way you should be making a guy jealous of you talking to other men is by having the aura of a high-value woman who seems to be sought after. Men just assume that if they don’t snatch you up, another man will. This is what I call defensive dating. The man will think, “Well, I better take her off the market because if I don’t, another man will.”
To get into depth on how to attract men and hook them, I suggest you check out my course Attraction Academy which you can find here.

30 Foolproof Signs He’s Jealous And Hiding It

I want to give you a bunch of signs on how to tell if a guy is jealous. However, the TOP 8 are going to be my clear and obvious signs that he’s jealous and trying to hide it. This is stuff guys do repeatedly because of the things I said above referring to why they get jealous and why he’s going to attempt to hide it from you. It’s more evolutionarily driven and human instinct. The other 22 things won’t be as common and based on his personality and the situation.

NOTE: This is not all men. This is usually low ego men who are insecure and/or don’t have a strong dating history. Normal men are not like this. I do not do these things when I am jealous. I let her do her thing because she’s not my girlfriend. If I don’t like it, I need to commit to her.

-He tries to rub shit in your face. Low ego men are really petty. He’s going to rub so much shit in your face if he’s jealous just to show you he doesn’t need you.

-He has that I don’t give a shit attitude. You may see him starting to act like an asshole so prepare. I highly suggest you don’t react to it because it only gives him power. The best thing to do is to excuse yourself from the situation by saying you’re tired or got to go. Leave him hanging instead. Teach him a lesson.

-He plays hard to get. He’s going to make you learn the hard way. If you’re talking to another guy, he’s going to pull away and see how you like it. He’s going to try to condition you in learning that if you talk to another guy, you’re going to deal with the consequences

-He starts to pull away. That’s right. If he’s jealous he has a chance of pulling away. Where women go wrong here is they back off on the thing they were doing that made him jealous. I am not saying make him jealous on purpose but please don’t lower your standards or change your life for a guy who is not your boyfriend. Just because you’re afraid of losing him doesn’t mean you have to ease back on things you want to do. That is counterproductive for two reasons:

If you do pull back, that guy gets A LOT of power. He knows you’re interested and that you want him.

He will use it against you. You just conditioned him to pull away and act like an asshole if things don’t go his way. Instead, if he gets jealous, you need to play it casually and flirt. Try to pivot off the topic and smile. I would even go as far and say, “Well I like you too so if you don’t want me on the market then take me off.”

-He makes it a power struggle. Guys are such egomaniacs. He doesn’t want to lose to the likes of you. He’s going to make sure you pay! If he feels he’s more interested in you than you are him, he’s going to try to find ways to gain power. That could be from pulling away, talking to other women, being passive-aggressive, and pretty much everything else I talk about on this top 8 list. It’s a me vs you mindset for a lot of low ego and insecure men. That is why I beg women not to date any guy just because you like him. If he’s insecure, low ego doesn’t have a dating history, and so on, then you need to have your guard up because those are the men who act like babies.

-He tries to make you chase him. He’s going to make you chase. He’s a powerful man. He’s not going to chase you. If he does, it’s not going to last.

-He starts to talk to other girls and give off the vibe of a player. This comes back around to making you pay the price. If you can flirt, he’s going to show you he can too.

-He is passive-aggressive. Guys aren’t going to tell you straight up they’re jealous. That’s not in our nature. Instead, he’s going to do things in order for you to take a hint.

Other Signs A Guy Is Jealous:

  • He sucks up to you
  • He asks a lot of questions but doesn’t want to seem eager
  • Your friends can tell he’s jealous
  • He changes his behavior suddenly
  • Acts masculine when he’s not
  • Tries to win you over
  • Always asks about your plans and what you’re doing
  • Seems way too over-eager
  • Texts you a bunch
  • Stops texting you
  • Stops by more often
  • Stalks your social media
  • If you’re out, he wants to leave all of a sudden
  • He creates space between you two because he doesn’t like what he’s seeing
  • He goes into his feminine energy
  • He goes out more
  • He goes out with the “guys” more
  • When you ask him if anything is wrong, he says “nothing”
  • Little things you do makes him mad
  • He becomes dramatic
  • Friends and family get involved in the problem

Let me know what you think. Do you have any clear signs that a guy is jealous but hiding it? What do you do when you’re jealous? How do you hide it from us?

Elliot

What's going on everybody? It's your favorite dating coach, Elliot Scott! I am a 32-year-old who loves to read, write, and play games. Yes, I have a life outside of giving advice :)

28 thoughts on “Revealed! 30 Foolproof Signs He’s Jealous And Hiding It-How To Tell If A Guy Is Jealous

  1. Hello! ive been dating this guy for 3 weeks now and we talked anout jealousy before, he told me that he used to be really jealous before but not anymore since he can control it also from his point of view, jealousy obly creates problems… Today i was hanging out with some friends and a girl took a photo of me and this guy friend of mine and i shared it with him teasing him saying that he’s my new date he laughed about it but later right after he just left me on seen and after 3hours i texted him asking him what he was doing so he said in a cold way that he’s with the guys eating and that was it like he didn’t say anything no more, he clearly told me before that he’s not jealous and his behavior doesn’t seem to me like one of a jealous guy so i don’t really understand… help someone!!

    1. Why would you tease him about something like that? You testing him? He is probably pissed at you for disrespecting him like that. Cleary a respect issue.

  2. I married this man. Now what? I did finally realize that I chose it! Why? Because I’m co dependent! Now I want out!

  3. Indeed. My boyfriend pulled back when I told him I can’t see him because I already make plans with my girlfriends. He acts like everything is okay but then he stopped calling and texting out of sudden.

  4. Since me and my exboyfriend had broken up suddenly his behaviour is different,sometime he will call me out of a sudden late at night..Yesterday,I post one of my best frind pic(it was a boy)when I post the next pic suddenly he didn’t look at my posting and plus he didn’t online,be4 I tell my friend I always daydreaming coz the way his strange behaviour even some time I feel like he had a jelousy feeling when I post dat pic,the next day I told my friend about this matter when I ask,my friend said maybe 50% he jelous and maybe 50% he don’t and now,I don’t know wat 2 do any more this matter just keep making me thinking until I daydreaming about it….

  5. I’m having s extramarital affair through texts and met once. It’s a good friend from high school. We reconnecting 22 years later on Facebook. There are feelings we discussed for sure. It was emotional at first then turned physical but with just kissing. He acts just like this. Do you find people in affairs like this one so the same thing?

  6. Your words are so true
    The first 8 points just happend exactly the same to me and i would say i had been wrong i tried to pull back and as u said he gained power and just stayed so cold and i felt sooo down well he is really toxic and i have to face him for two years til the study ends .. wish me strength and luck 😇

  7. I was Christmas shopping with my husband, he was standing near me when I saw my friend coming. I went over and asked him where something was he gave me sort of a mean, but sort of blank glare like why did I go over and ask him anything. He answered my I said thank you but he just walked away. The next day him and me where the first ones to show up to a morning meeting didn’t even bother to say hi, during the meeting though I was standing in front of him and I could see him looking at me. At lunch with my one girl friend he was at a table to the side of us and at times he was looking over at me. Later in the day I walked over to two of the older ladies from my department who were standing with him chatting and he would not look at me. I made a comment about something he acknowledged it and replied back but still didn’t look at me. It was odd that he was giving me the cold shoulder when two days before he was eating his lunch but came over and was assisting me in making a Gingerbread house and touched my hand as I was trying to get the roof to stay, he was all nice then. That was not the first time he has acted that way when I was with my husband. I was standing with my husband and he was walking by so I smiled at him he gave me a death glare and then he shook his head and walked up the stairs to where he worked.

  8. I posted pic on my watsaap status of a certain guy,I wanted to make my boyfriend jealous and to gain his attention but he went so dramatic and started telling me that am texting him shit just because i told him that i like them both,so he went silent and he has not talked to me yet what should i do am afraid to loose him

  9. I have been divorced from my sx husband since 2000 and i get remarried back in 2008. I believe that he has been jealious ever since .He found me on facebook and our reationship when we married was horrible. We had talked since the divorce and now out of the clear blue he wants to be friends again yes we have three children together. And say he wants to be friends again. And i think that he jealious. But i asked him he was and he told no he wasnt. There at least two or three signs here that say that he jealious. And because how he fells about me ge want leave me alone and move on .i have blocked him

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  11. I HAVE CHURCHMATE GUY,HIS REALLY APPROACHABLETO ME NICE,AND SHAKE HIS HANDS WHENEVR HE SEES ME.HE SMILE MORE OFTEN BUT AFTER I HAVE SHAKE HANDS WITH HIS FRIENDS FOR ABOUT 2 SECONDS..AFTER THE CHRUCH SERVICE HE SUDDENLY CHANGE.HE NEVER SMILE AT ME OR TALK TO ME..USUALLY HE GIVES COMPLIMENT BUT RIGHT NOW HIS TOTALLY SILENT..

  12. I have a difficult situation. I’m married (22 years) he isn’t jealous.. he isn’t overly protective.. basically I can do what I want..which leads me to why I’m writing this..while a work I fell in love with someone..I tried to stay away..it’s not about sex for either of us..he knows my situation..he is signal and wants to be with me. I don’t have a problem with it..but my husband is sick and he will only get worse in time.. I do love my husband but I’m no longer in love with him. The guy I’m having a relationship with was on the phone with me and he heard me call my husband honey..I’ve always called him that..it would be weird if I called him by his name…well the guy that I’m seeing got really pissed off And I didn’t know why cause he refused to talk to me..this went on for 4 days.. finally he called..he acted as if I should know why he was mad..I of course didn’t and that pissed him off even more..I tried to tell him I’m not a mind reader that he knew I was married and that it will be difficult for awhile…I was upfront and said I do love him but I’m no longer in love with him…
    What I don’t understand is if someone says they love you and want to be with you then why would he shut me out like that. He had to know it was going to hurt me.. and should I be worried about this kind of behavior..when he finally came around he said I don’t want to hear you call another man honey or anything especially when I can’t be the one that is with you.

  13. So me and this guy in my class have known each other for years. And a few weeks ago, he asked me out. Of course, I accepted, and now we’ve been dating for about a month now. One thing that keeps grabbing my attention is that he’ll start to act distant if I’m talking to another guy, which to me is a big problem since I have a lot of guy friends. I don’t want him to feel jealous, but I also don’t want to drop half of my friends just because my boyfriend is overreacting. And… I don’t think I made the situation any better by hugging one of my friends. Which, of course I can see how that oversteps the boundaries, but I feel like I should be able to hang out with other guys (as friends) if my boyfriend can have female friends!

    1. I use to be like that, but I’m very self aware. One thing I’d say that helped was that my gf at the time included me in with her guy friends and I got to know them more. As time went on they became my friends and I could care less if they hung out, hugged, or whatever. I would say you and your bf should make an attempt to include each other in your group of friends. You know you’re friends and he knows his, and the more he sees your side and vis versa it will subside. It’s not knowing the unknown is where the jealousy comes from. For me anyway.

  14. I hate it when I check out another guy’s girl but don’t say anything. This guy was watching me to see if I was jealous. I don’t like when someone tries to provoke me. I’m not a egomaniac like some guys are. When I talk to a girl I don’t force myself on them because I believe if it’s meant to be let it come, if not I’ll move on in my life. I feel like I should not be mad just because I can have the girl he has. I want my own girl who I can be with. So far as relationship I never had one. If I love a girl I set her free. I I love women so much Ill stay away from them because I don’t wanna make them feel uncomfortable. Real shit over here son.

  15. I hate it when I check out another guy’s girl but don’t say anything. If I didn’t try to talk to her don’t worry about it. If I dating a girl I watch to she what she will do. I can’t watch a girl 24/7, what kinda shit is that. I’m not gonna force a girl to be with me. Today this guy was watching me to see if I was jealous. I don’t like when someone tries to provoke me. It happens to me so much that I don’t even look at the girl anymore cause I know how some guys are. They assume shit. I’m not a egomaniac like some guys are. When I talk to a girl I don’t force myself on them because I believe if it’s meant to be let it come, if not I’ll move on in my life. I feel like I should not be mad just because I can have the girl he has. I want my own girl who I can be with. So far as relationship I never had one. If I love a girl I set her free. I I love women so much Ill stay away from them because I don’t wanna make them feel uncomfortable. Real shit over here son.

  16. my boyfriend asked me if i liked a guy I said no but I was suspicious because about 2 weeks before I was sitting next to the same guy he asked me about and he got mad. what should I do???

  17. Oh yes! If he has girlfriends and is dating u, there should be no problem with u having boyfriends.
    I was a platonic friend to a guy, but he wanted more. I didn’t of course. Eventually things got out of hand in our friendship. He told me this friend (girl) of his he is not dating. It is none of my business because i just want to be friends. I was uncomfortable with her specifically. When i saw them 2 together, i realized that she was the one who wanted more. By the end of that year he was thinking of marrying her. I realize that most of the time, in a guy and girl relationship, one or the other usually wants to be more than friends.
    This other guy that i actually liked had a girlfriend, i think. She was around him a lot. I know for sure he was attracted to me because of the way be looked at me. He is a very kind handsome person with a big career, which is no wonder why i would see girls cluster around him. Am i really jealous?? People say i don’t act like it. This girl was there before me and she is more successful than i am, which maybe something he prefers more. If he wanted to do something about it, he could. When he went to my old work place to ask for me, he said he was picking up food for his girlfriend. They told me he was blushing (which he should have cuz that sounds bad). I think he realized that he cannot get away with having 2 girlfriends like that. You have to pick who is going to be your priority.

  18. Hi, I want to ask, are you publishing articles (guest entry), if I write you good content, naturally I will pay you, I am waiting for an answer, thanks!

  19. Umm i like this guy and he knows cause out of frustration my best friend told him so after him knowing he started talking about liking my best friend and my other friend i think trying to make me jealous . Does it mean he likes me

  20. Iv had a guy like this . He would actually start putting me down . Talk about what I was wearing and if I dressed like that when I wasn’t with him blatantly all over other girls social media so I could see . Post pictures of himself with no top on after the gym on social media if I had plans With friends . Tell me how much girls want him , then give me the sob story of how girls have treated him badly in the past so I gave my loyalty . Probably more of a narcissist tbh ! I think jealousy and insecurity in a man can be dangerous it put me in a dark place when I gave up and took it until I said no I’m not doing this to myself and walked away no one deserves this mental abuse and I hope anyone who was searching for answers from this feed walks away before it takes over you jealousy is unhealthy

  21. Yo, this is the worst advice you could give women.
    You’re basically telling women that a man should never be displeased with anything she does, otherwise he’s low-ego, and insecure.

    Literally the VERY first comment from a woman on here, is asking why her date “pulled away” after she showed him a picture of her with another man, and said the man was her “new date”.

    When a man and a woman, value the relationship they are in, they take care to not disrespect each other.
    If you’re trying to “empower” women, by telling them to date “Betas” that will tolerate their shit (to prove they aren’t the jealous type), you are setting the women up to fail. Because they will cheat on the men you are trying to set them up with.
    Women WANT men who won’t take their shit. Women WANT men who can win at the power game.
    Women WANT men who establish dominance.
    So why would you tell women to avoid the men who do this?

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