Ladies, there are very many reasons why a man would suddenly pull away from a relationship that was seemingly going so well. When this happens, it’s only natural for you to wonder if he still misses you or if he pulls away, can he still miss you?
The truth is: Yes! It’s very possible for a man to miss you if he pulls away.
In fact, I would go as far as saying that it’s very likely that at some point, he will miss you. However, it really depends on the reason why he pulled away in the first place.
Why Did He Pull Away?
This is a subject I have touched on repeatedly because it’s something that keeps happening in the majority of relationships. I can say that at least one out of every three of my one-on-one clients wonder why their men pull away.
Now, ladies, I will tell you this: there are very many reasons why a guy would pull away. The reasons are almost as varied as the men themselves. That being said, there are some common factors that tend to apply to a majority of men. Your man could pull away because:
- You guys had an argument and he made a rash, in-the-heat-of-the-moment decision.
- He is going through something in his personal life.
- He is developing an interest in someone else.
- He is starting to develop real feelings for you.
As you may have noticed, these are all reasons that have very little to do with you. Yes, sometimes, it’s all about the guy. Go-figure. However, there are other reasons why he pulls away that may have a lot to do with the relationship you guys have:
- You guys were fighting a lot.
- Maybe it’s just better this way.
- He just needed a little time off (a break).
The worst one would be that he saw something in you that set off a red flag. Things like maybe:
- You are too clingy.
- You are pushing too hard for him to commit.
- He has heard “stories” about you.
Basically, he suddenly decides to “ghost” you because he saw something or felt something that made him feel, albeit temporarily, that you just weren’t the one for him.
Here is a video that could shed some light on why he may be suddenly ignoring you:
Can He Miss You Once He Pulls Away?
Yes, he can and will probably miss you once he pulls away. So don’t go deleting him on Facebook, Instagram or blocking his calls entirely because, depending on why he pulled away, he will miss you at some point.
And this is true for almost every situation except when it’s a really bad breakup and you guys just can’t be on the same hemisphere together. Other than wanting to completely ruin each other’s lives and then key the side of both your cars just for kicks, there is a good chance that he will miss you once he pulls away.
As tough as we all want to seem, men are often a little mushy inside. Especially if we like/liked you. So even when he pulls away, rest assured that your man will think back on the kind of girl you were, how good he had it and wish you guys were back together. Albeit fleetingly.
Men Also Reminisce
Yes, men tend to reminisce on the good times you guys had. These moments tend to come suddenly and when he is at his lowest or happiest.
- If he is at his lowest, he will think back on how you used to make things seem okay and he will miss that – by extension, miss you.
- If he is at his best, he will think about how you guys used to celebrate such wonderful moments and wish he could call you to tell you all about it.
If you guys had a good thing going and he decided to pull away for whatever reasons, there will come a time when he will miss you. And if the relationship isn’t too far gone (as in you aren’t already married – yes, some ladies move fast, or you haven’t completely blocked all forms of contact from him) he will think of calling you or maybe just liking one of your Instagram photos.
This is a sign that he is missing you. And when this happens, it could very well lead to him finding out about how you are doing and who you are doing it with. This will lead to the next step.
He Will Keep Checking Out Your Social Media Pages
This is particularly true if he feels as though he made a mistake or he feels like you are the one who wronged him and that you should apologize.
- If he is the one who made a mistake and is too pig-headed to apologize, he will check your social media pages to make sure that you haven’t moved on.
- If he feels as though you wronged him and is waiting for an apology, he will check your social media pages hoping to see that you are miserable.
The more he checks your social media pages the more he reminisces about the time you guys had together and the more he may feel as though he made a mistake and he should call you. That’s when he starts second-guessing himself.
He Will Always Second Guess Himself
He will start second-guessing himself: you know, thinking that maybe:
- He made a mistake.
- He acted in a rush manner.
All these reasons are triggers for him missing you. He will start thinking about all the goods time you guys had together and remember how beautiful you were and kind to him. He will start thinking that maybe he made a mistake.
Time Makes Him Think More Clearly
When it comes to relationships, time is a strange concept. It can either work for you or against you. In this case, however, time is most likely going to be your friend. This is especially true if the guy feels as though he made a rash decision or a mistake in pulling away.
If he pulled away because you guys had a fight or he was just going through something, then time will make him think more clearly. The time he takes away from you will make him miss having you around.
This is particularly true is the kind of relationship you had before he pulled away had signs that it was going to work out:
- You are both healthy individuals who are mature and level headed (his rash decision to pull away notwithstanding).
- The relationship had benefits for both of you (you made each other happy, you wanted the best for each other etc.)
- You stimulated each other both sexually and intellectually.
- You were already transitioning from “me” to “we”.
- The relationship didn’t feel forced. It fell naturally into place.
The time he spends away from you will make him realize that maybe he made a mistake. Even if he starts entertaining the thought of seeing other women. He will inadvertently compare them to you. Unfairly so because these other women will be competing with a version of you that had already gotten to know him better and had the inside track.
They will inevitably fall short and he will feel as though he is wasting his time with them. This will prompt him to call you.
What Should You Do When He Pulls Away to Get Him Back?
This is a tricky one. While there is a chance that he will come back to you after pulling away, there is also always that chance that he just might meet someone else who is a better fit for him while you guys are on your “break”.
So, what should you do as a woman to ensure that he doesn’t completely forget about you? (Assuming, of course, that you want him back):
- Don’t be too pushy and demanding: If he seemingly doesn’t have a “good enough” reason for pulling away, pushing him to come back to you won’t make the situation any better.
- Don’t shut all the avenues back to you: Him pulling away will probably hurt your feelings and you may be tempted to completely shut him out of your life. Maybe this isn’t the best course of action just yet. Don’t delete him from your social media nor block him from contacting you. Let him have that available option should he choose to contact you again.
- Give him the time he needs: Once things have quieted down a little bit (if he pulled away because you guys had a heated argument) just try to reach out via text and tell him that you understand he needs time and you are okay with that. Let him know that you are there if he needs to talk but don’t push him to do so.
It’s a patience game. If he pulls away from you, you may feel rejected at first but if you feel like there is a real connection there then you should be patient and keep that avenue open. I know you probably miss him a lot and at some point during his “pulling away” days, he WILL miss you too and just might call you.