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5 Genius Ways On Making A Guy Feel Bad Who Hurt You (Warning: Powerful)

Do you want to know how to make a guy feel bad for hurting you?

I don’t think you’re a bad person for wanting to do this. We all have been hurt by someone we love and want them to know how bad they hurt us. It’s human nature.

While I don’t agree with everything I am about to say in this article, the things I discuss will make a guy feel bad for hurting you and let him know how you feel.

How To Make A Guy Feel Bad For Hurting You

There are 5 things you must do to make a guy feel bad for hurting you. Those things are:

  1. Attack his ego
  2. Call him out for hurting you
  3. Cut him off from you
  4. Replace him with someone else
  5. Stop caring about what he thinks

Trust me, this is powerful stuff. I know you have read these things on the internet and they sound like common sense but if that is the case, why don’t you follow though and do them?

See, the problem is the fact that you want to make a guy feel bad for hurting you. Your ego and pride are still involved.

That’s okay. That’s normal. However, you’re still attached. You’re still outcome dependent. No, you may not like him as you did but you’re still tied up in all the bullcrap while he’s making you an option hence why he hurt you in the first place.

Don’t worry though, I am going to go into detail on why these 5 tricks work in making a guy feel bad who hurt you.

Attack His Ego

In my other post called, “How To Make A Guy Jealous Who Doesn’t Like You.” I talk about how a guy like you isn’t necessary if you want to make him feel jealous for leaving you.

I mentioned how men are very egotistical creatures and the fact that you’re taking away his resources (despite him being the one to leave) has a powerful effect over time.

The reason for this is how women usually react when a guy breaks her heart:

She will be upset and hopes he returns. Sometimes, she will beg and try to convince him to come back around.

However, you can’t negotiate attraction.

You cannot negotiate attraction

You can only build it. However, the fact that a lot of you stay around, hoping he will change his mind don’t realize that he will take advantage of these types of things. He may:

  • drain you of your assets (which will give you more hope) but never commit
  • Lead you on
  • Never make a choice because he doesn’t have to since you’re not going anywhere
  • Orbit and breadcrumb you
  • and more

Instead, learn to take the assets that he wanted and invest them elsewhere. Even if he doesn’t like you, HE STILL LOSES THE ASSETS. The biggest problem I see a lot of women have is they don’t do that. they don’t cut him off from the assets. Then wonder why he’s not committing.

Assets equate to advantages in the evolutionary world and the world of attraction.

If you truly want to make a guy feel bad for hurting you, you’re not going to do that by sitting around making yourself a viable option.

Take those assets and invest them in another man. Better yet, just make him realize he doesn’t have them.

Does he even worry about losing you yet? Have you actually gave him the chance of missing you? Or does he know he can have you at any time he desires?

Call Him Out For Hurting You

Some women are so passive aggressive that the only way he needs to avoid it is to ignore you.

I also know a lot of women who are afraid of calling a guy out because she’s afraid it will push him away further.


Get a backbone!

If the guy did you wrong, call him out on it. The two reasons guys do what they do to women are

  1. Because you let him
  2. He thinks he can get away with it

Even if it pushes him away, let it be known how you feel. If he has any sort of empathy or has had his heart broken before, he will sympathize with it. Doesn’t mean he will come back, but he can relate to it at least.

If he did something scummy such as lead you on, you need to call him out. Make sure he realizes what he did so he doesn’t do that to other women.

I tell a lot of my clients that the reason the guy hurt you (in a scummy way) is due to the fact that not only is he just a horrible person but he did it to women in his past and got away with it.

No one called him out!

Because of this, he doesn’t see the damage he’s done. He’s only perceived it through his own lens.

Cut Him Off 100% If He Hurt You

The thing that irritates me the most as a coach is the fact that women stick around hoping these dudes will change despite him treating her like crap and it being obvious this is just who he is as a person.

How is he going to learn his lesson if you don’t cut him off?

How is he going to feel bad if you stay around responding to his text?

I don’t care how he feels. I don’t care if he is mad at you. I don’t care if you want him back.

If a guy is treating you like crap and you stick around because you have such low standards that you want this type of guy, why wouldn’t he keep doing it?

Replace Him With Someone Else

I know you may think this doesn’t work since the reason you’re hurting is he left you but that’s not true.

If he sees that you are over it and talking to someone else, that means he is cut off from you. It is the symbol of you cutting him off that is powerful.

Men fight among under men in a competitive nature to attract women. Men think that if I have her, she’s mine and off the market. The fact that he let you go and you started to talk to someone else to take his place means that new person is getting the assets not him.

While you may think that doesn’t hurt him, it does. It’s the fact that he’s not getting anything while you are. It’s the fact that even though he hurt you, what you’re giving this new guy was once his. Men reflect on this.

Stop Caring What He Thinks


I know you like him but he hurt you. Whether it’s by leading you on, dumping you, or whatever. It’s obvious it’s not meant to be.

Stop wasting time on a dude who is making you an option.

It makes me upset when I see great women who get treated like shit still wanting to be with this guy and they’re only making him jealous in hopes he realizes what he lost and comes crawling back.

Yeah, that’s real healthy.

The fact that you care what he thinks will always put you in a losing position.


Because you’re outcome dependent. You have no room to negotiate anything and then wonder why this keeps happening to you.

It’s all about standards.

Uphold those standards. if he falls short, that’s on him, not you. Stop caring what these dudes think when they can’t even put in the effort in the relationship.

If you want real help, my course Attraction Academy will get you there. No jokes. All the information you need about men, their psychology, why they do what they do, and how to get them to love you on a deep level is in there.

Check it out.


What's going on everybody? It's your favorite dating coach, Elliot Scott! I am a 32-year-old who loves to read, write, and play games. Yes, I have a life outside of giving advice :)

15 thoughts on “5 Genius Ways On Making A Guy Feel Bad Who Hurt You (Warning: Powerful)

  1. Thank you BUT if I have to replace him with someone else in order to have a reaction from him : thanks but no thanks.
    If a guy doesn’t see my value I’m not gonna prostitute myself with someone I don’t love to make him come back.
    My opinion is that if a man is interested by a woman, trust me no matter what she says or do – he will stick around, will do everything to understand her and why she’s saying or doing this or that …
    – he will be caring and supportive
    So, no … all those games are not the solution.
    Unless it is your thing and you like to play mind games, manipulation and so on.
    Good Luck Ladies !
    May you meet someone real and honest.
    Be safe and take care,

    1. you are right. And what about the guy we will replace him with, what if he really loves me and I don’t. won’t I just become like the guy who hurt me?

      1. You might, try not to be that person. If you wake up one day and realize your not in it, be kind, concise and direct. Apologize, move on and learn from your mistakes.

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  3. I love this article, I reference it regularly. I found it after I had done all of these things. I love the accountability being placed on us ourselves. I haven’t been dating long (13 year marriage), one short thing and then my very first “I don’t know what I want” man. Elliot is so right, your going to cry…for a bit, then you move forward and I can tell you from experience there is a certain grace in being the one to close the door.

    Go ahead, be brave enough to break your own heart and chase the life you want or accept the one you settle for and have it broken for you over and over again.

    Mad love ladies.

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  12. I kind of get the whole “replacing,” your ex thing like a rebound but is that really any healthier Elliott? I like most of your advice and I get what how a new guy could be a distraction or quick ego boost but I get so depressed and obsessed with whoever has left me such as this last guy who ghosted me. He hasn’t contacted me since Thursday and that was just to tell me he was busy/stressed/hadn’t slept in days etc. So initially I believed him and figured once he slept id hear back but no word the next day so I sent him a text in the morning responding to his previous one just saying “I’m sorry.” And then still no word by the end of the day so I sent another text saying, “I just don’t understand why you can’t talk to me when you’re stressed.” No response. But the messages said delivered so I know he got them. It’s weird because we talked until Thursday morning we would text all day pretty consistently and he seemed really into me. Or so I thought. The other thing I don’t get is he told me earlier on when we first started talking that he was against “ghosting,” but he ghosted me?? Is that a line ghosters use lol. I feel so out of touch because I haven’t dated in years due to prev relationship trauma and abandonment issues and then it happened again! And every time they assure me they won’t leave me..they do. It’s like they love bomb me or manipulate me into dating them when I’m not even that into them? Then I fall for them and they disappear. This is something I’ve been dealing with for many years. I’ve tried therapy and self help books and just reading constant dating advice articles/blogs etc. and here I am still single in my 30s in this revolving door of NPD men or whatever. This guy lasted around 6 wks. They all seem to end (abruptly) at 4-6 wks. And as soon as things are progressing and I’m feeling more secure about the relationship, poof! They’re gone. And this one hurt even more before he knew all my anxieties and played on them I believe. Or just used me idk. He probably doesn’t even have the capability or awareness of what he is doing or did to me. I even wonder if someone knows beforehand they’re about to ghost? Like, did he ever like me? Was it all a lie? Did I not submit to his wants/needs so he discarded me? He made me believe we had a “connection.” But the truth is, he only had a connection w/ his dick. I guess I fell for all this lies and overlooked red flags and ignored my gut which said, “he’s a screaming sociopath,” and definitely was on the spectrum. Thank you for letting me share.

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